NFC Hierarchy/Obituary, Week 16

Week 15 of the NFL season is in the books, and the Philadelphia Eagles remain kinda-sorta alive, despite losing in the desert to the Arizona Cardinals. As such, there are no new obituaries this week.

Obituaries

None.

Graveyard



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Hierarchy

9) Eagles (4-9-1): Is it safe to say that right now, after a loss to an average Cardinals team, that this is the most optimistic the Eagles' fan base has felt about the team since, like, September? If so, it's funny to me that the most optimistic point intersects with the week the team fell into last place of one of the worst divisions in NFL history.

Of course, that's because Jalen Hurts has sparked the offense (he's been good, not great), and the team has actually been watchable the last two weeks, which is more than could be said of the team the previous two or so months. But that's still an incredibly low bar, and only underscores how painfully dreadful the 2020 season has been.

In reality, there shouldn't be optimism, at all. The roster is old, bad, and expensive, and it's going to take substantial time to undo the mess that has been created. The upcoming 2021 offseason is perhaps the most important one since, um, ever? The decisions that are made are going to shape the direction of team, for better or worse, for the foreseeable future, and Jeffrey Lurie cannot make the wrong choices.

Last week: 9

8) Giants (5-9): The Giants clinched their fourth straight losing season, and their seventh losing season in eight years. With the Jets' win over the Rams, and the Giants' loss to the Browns, the Giants reclaimed their share of the worst record in the NFL since 2017:

Team Record Team Record 
Chiefs 47-15 Texans29-33 
Saints 47-15 Falcons28-34 
Patri*ts 42-20 49ers28-34
Ravens 42-20 Dolphins27-35
Rams 42-20 Panthers27-35
Steelers 41-19-1 Buccaneers26-36
 Seahawks40-22 Cardinals24-37-1
Vikings 37-24-1 Raiders24-38
Packers 37-24-1 Browns23-38-1
Titans 37-25 Lions23-38-1
Bills 36-26  Broncos23-39 
Eagles 35-26-1 Football Team23-39
Cowboys 32-30 Jaguars22-40
Bears 32-30 Bengals17-43-1
Colts 31-31 Giants17-45
Chargers 31-31  Jets17-45


It's a bad time for New Jersey football.

Last week: 8

7) Football Team (6-8): In relief of Alex Smith, Dwayne Haskins stunk for most of the day against Seattle, and the Football Team was down 20-3 in the fourth quarter. And then Haskins kind of woke up and made it interesting. There were 6 possessions in the fourth quarter:

  1. Football Team: 14-play, 96-yard drive for a TD. 20-9 (Missed PAT)
  2. Seahawks: 6 plays, INT.
  3. Football Team: 11-play, 64-yard drive for a TD. 20-15 (2-point conversion failed)
  4. Seahawks: 3-and-out.
  5. Football Team: 14-play, 49-yard drive ends with a turnover on downs.
  6. Seahawks: A few kneeldowns, and game over.

It's unclear when Smith will be back (there's a chance he's done for the season — we'll see), but Haskins can maybe build on that fourth quarter, and head into their final two games against the crappy Panthers and Eagles with some confidence?

Quarterbacks aside, this is clearly the best roster in the NFC East.

Last week: 7

6) Cardinals (8-6): The Cardinals are fun team with their share of very good players. I think it's easy to watch them and be able to identify guys like Kyler Murray, DeAndre Hopkins, Haason Reddick, and Budda Baker making impressive plays, which makes them perhaps seem better than they actually are. But beyond the sizzle of the star players, this roster doesn't have much in the way of steak.

They're susceptible to both the run and the pass on defense, and offensively, while they are certainly more than capable of generating their share of explosive plays, I think it's hard to trust their consistency, given Murray's frenetic style.

They still have some building to do, and I think they'll play in a very entertaining first round playoff game in which they're eliminated. 

Last week: 6

5) Rams (9-5): They lost to the Jets.

Last week: 3

4) Buccaneers (9-5): I would think this is clever if "stinging like A.B." couldn't have some other meaning.

Last week: 5

3) Seahawks (10-4): Selective sample size fun fact:

• NFC East since Week 11: 10-9.

• NFC West since Week 11: 10-10.

What does this have to do with the Seahawks? Not much, but it's almost 1:00 p.m. and I have to publish this thing already, so shut up.

Last week: 4

2) Saints (10-4): Drew Brees returned, and he was 15 of 34, which I figured had to be one of the lowest completion percentages in his entire career. And sure enough:

If this team is the second-best team in the NFC (they probably are?), then the NFC sucks.

Last week: 2

1) Packers (11-3): The Packers are really in the drivers' seat now for the 1 seed in the NFC, and looking around at the rest of the conference, there isn't some "run it down your throat" bully offense to take down the Packers like the Niners did last year. 

Most predictive sites, like fivethirtyeight.com for example, have the Saints with the best odds to represent the NFC in the Super Bowl. I don't understand that at all. Aaron Rodgers looks like he did in his prime, and no other quarterback in the conference is near his level right now.

Last week: 1

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