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August 18, 2017

End the Trend: 20 fads that have to go away, like, yesterday

Trends, by their very nature, are born to die, yet some trends ride a wave of popularity for considerably longer than they should.

Remember that “Blurred Lines” song by Psy or Los Del Rio or Clara Peller or some Hatchimals or whatever? Yeah. Now you know what we mean.

We here at PhillyVoice have been contemplating some current trends that get on our nerves.

Yeah, yeah, it’s summer, and we’re all supposed to be footloose and fancy free before noses return to grindstones in a few short weeks. 

But whatever. 

Venting about things we’d just like to see go away makes us feel better.

So here, in no particular order are 20 entries for this End the Trend collection. Since we are a group of individuals, some of these may seem contradictory. But whatever. It’s a list. And we all have opinions. Besides, you're more than welcome to submit some of your own or call us out as haters in the comments section.

End the Trend list

1. Articles about millennials ruining everything. It’s been a tired angle for a while now, folks.

2. Millennials complaining about articles about millennials ruining everything. (Because they are ruining everything.)

3. Unnecessary GoFundMe fundraising drives. This has been going on for far too long. Emergency situations? Crowdfunding is a good wrinkle of our new insta-communication world. But when it strays from needs to wants, well, you're just making friends, family members and even strangers judge you behind your back.

4. People who post photos from their Crossfit workouts – and perfect body shots – on Instagram every.single.morning. We get it, you work out. Just like we got it yesterday. And the day before. And the day before that.

5. The cultish mentality of Crossfit. It’s just weird. When are they gonna grab the purple shrouds?

6. People who post photos of their dogs dressed up in costumes (You know who you are. Don't fire me.)

7. A mentality that drives people to go places solely for Instagram and/or selfie purposes. Vapid much?

8. Nude color leggings. I mean, what’s the point? (Writer's note: Black knee highs are perfectly fine and beyond judgment.)

9. RompHims. Seriously, bro?

10. Man buns. C’mon, man.

11. Men in romphims with their hair in man buns. Ok, now you’re really pushing it beyond the pale.

12. False equivalences becoming part of the national discussion. Y'know, like that whole "both sides" angle being pushed by certain politicians and his or her supporters.

13. Re-litigating the 2016 election. Psst, the primary and general elections are over. Move along from the Bernie vs. Hillary discussion into something that will, you know, actually make a difference in the world.

14. Chokers. Sorry, but just tying a piece of fabric around your neck is not cool. Especially "chokers for men."

15. Those stupid friggin’ Snapchat dog filters.

16. Crazy mermaid braids. The Kardashians probably cashed in on this despite the fact that they make everybody look terrible. This has become an international problem now.

17. Multi-level marketing schemes like Rodan + Fields. Wrote one respondent:

“If I have one more person pitch me skin care on Facebook…” 

Don’t find out how that sentence ends, folks. Knock it off with the normalization of grifting.

18. The penchant to sit on the beach, or at dinner, or at happy hour, or anywhere that human interaction is an implied part of the social contract, but getting lost in your phone. Be present, people.

19. Those people who thread a whole bunch of comments after Donald Trump tweets. Do they think they’re better than the pro-Trump bots who do the same exact thing? We get it. He's saying things you can disprove, but there's gotta be a better way to make a difference than having an alert set up and banging out 20 tweets to call him out for it. It hasn't worked so far.

20. Hating on Anthony Scaramucci

The Mooch is chill af. Let’s remember him as a comet who shined brightly but only brightly enough to make the fact that this country is batshit cray entertaining for, oh, 10 or 11 days.

That's all for now. Please let us know what we missed in the comments.