October 31, 2022
Eric Hartline/USA TODAY Sports
The Eagles are overrated. They haven't even beaten the Bills or Chiefs yet this season.
Week 8 of the NFL season is in the books, and a pair of legendary quarterbacks in Tom Brady and Aaron Rodgers continue to have nightmare seasons. There are no new obituaries this week, so let's just get right to the Hierarchy.
13) Cardinals (3-5): I strongly considered killing off the Cardinals this week, but they're still only two games back in the disappointing NFC West, behind the surprise Seahawks. Despite their poor play all season long, the Cardinals have a golden opportunity to get back in the hunt at home against Seattle Week 9. If they lose that game, they're done.
Last week: 11
12) Saints (3-5): Painful as it may be, Eagles fans better hope that Tom Brady gets his shit together and the Bucs start winning games again, or the Saints are going to win the NFC South.
Last week: 13
11) Buccaneers (3-5): The Buccaneers lost again. That's now three losses in a row and five losses in six games. You know what that means. Guys are going to get yelled at.
Tom Brady isn't happy 😳pic.twitter.com/w4HcXu4vr9
— Action Network (@ActionNetworkHQ) October 28, 2022
"Tom Brady isn't happy 😳" is basically the Bucs' 2022 team slogan.
Brady aside, this team has gotten torn apart in the run game this season. On Thursday night the Ravens outgained the Bucs 231-44 on the ground. That has been a season-long issue:
• Rushing yards (offense): 495
• Rushing yards allowed (defense): 1059
• Rushing yard differential: -564
Last week: 8
10) Packers (3-5): The Davante Adams trade this offseason could go down as one of the biggest lose-lose deals ever.
From the Raiders' perspective, Adams is having a good season, with 38 catches for 512 yards and 5 TDs, but he's super expensive, he cost a couple of high draft picks, and he turns 30 in December. Vegas is now 2-5 after their shutout loss to the Saints. If we included AFC teams in this weekly column, we'd be writing their obituary. That trade was a classic case of a front office overrating the talent on their own team and going all in at a time that they shouldn't have.
From the Packers' perspective, how many years left are they going to have with Aaron Rodgers? They didn't want to give themselves the best chance of making a couple of more runs at the Super Bowl? They were fine with trading a receiver who was averaging 119 catches for 1464 yards and 15 TDs the previous two seasons? It didn't make any sense then and it sure as hell doesn't make any sense now.
Last week: 9
9) Falcons (4-4): We have a strong contender for the weirdest win of the season. First, the Panthers scored on a 62-yard TD connection from P.J. Walker to D.J. Moore with only 12 seconds remaining.
PJ WALKER JUST DID THAT. HAIL MARY TO DJ MOORE. pic.twitter.com/dDYwoZhaGG
— NFL (@NFL) October 30, 2022
So the Panthers should have won it with an extra point, but as you see in the video above, the fired-up Moore ripped his helmet off in celebration, and he was flagged for it. On the ensuing PAT which was now from 48 yards out instead of 35... Oh no!
Eddy Piniero MISSED the extra point!!! What is happening??? #KeepPounding #DirtyBirds pic.twitter.com/z30oLh4mlb
— Pro Football Culture (@proftblculture) October 30, 2022
Eddy Piniero MISSED IT again!!! And this game is still not over! #KeepPounding #DirtyBirds pic.twitter.com/PLl5YfhWDb
— Pro Football Culture (@proftblculture) October 30, 2022
The Falcons then drove down and sealed the win with a field goal.
The NFC South: pic.twitter.com/rDYoAXd8YH
— Unmistakable Latin Flavor (@UrinatingTree) October 30, 2022
Last week: 10
8) Commanders (4-4): The Commanders were 2-4, and were a completely lifeless dreck of a team with no direction and no juice.
(And then something happened here).
And then the Commanders won two straight games during which they played with emotion.
Last week: 12
7) Rams (3-4): The Rams had the ball with 1:02 left in the fourth quarter at their own 15 in a game they were losing by 17 points, and Sean McVay kept his starters in. And sure enough, their best player (on offense) got hurt.
The play where Cooper Kupp got hurt. Looked like his legs got rolled up underneath his body pic.twitter.com/bnUdNz0Zcn
— Will Brinson (@WillBrinson) October 30, 2022
Last week: 6
6) 49ers (4-4): When the Niners are clicking, they look like one of the potentially elite teams in the NFL. In their four wins, they have outscored their opponents by a combined score of 119-45.
Of course, they have also lost to the Bears, Broncos, and Falcons, a trio of teams that all have negative point differentials and a combined record of 7-14 against non-Niners opponents.
Last week: 7
5) Giants (6-2): The Giants have continuously benefited from opponents making big mistakes in the second halves of games, leading to their 6-1 record heading into Week 8. In their game against the Seahawks, it looked like a dropped TD by Tyler Lockett might be that big mistake that turned the game in their favor:
Tyler Lockett you just can’t drop that pass man 🤦🏾♂️#GoHawks | #NYGvsSEA
— Boolin Sports (@BoolinSports) October 30, 2022
pic.twitter.com/ztJgWaq8cM
Nope. Not this time. They simply never got anything going offensively. 225 total yards, 14 first downs, and two fumbles by their punt returner:
RICHIE JAMES SOLD THE GAME 😭😭 pic.twitter.com/4KJfhtio9Z
— Brian Y (@byysports) October 30, 2022
Last week: 4
4) Seahawks (5-3): I caught pieces of the second half of the Seahawks-Giants, and No. 10 for Seattle was everywhere. Just an absolute menace. Would you even know who that is? I didn't. Turns out it was Uchenna Nwosu, who was one of the players that I thought would have made a lot of sense for the Eagles in free agency this past offseason. The Eagles instead signed Haason Reddick, and I don't think they regret that in any way. But Nwosu has been awesome this year as well for Seattle, with 35 tackles, 5 sacks, 2 forced fumbles, 12 QB hits, and 3 pass breakups.
Uchenna Nwosu no sack pic.twitter.com/U6kC5eG2SV
— Rapinas do Mar (Cortes) (@cortesrapinas) October 30, 2022
Last week: 5
3) Cowboys (6-2): It's been pretty clear for a couple of years now that Tony Pollard is a better player than Ezekiel Elliott. With Zeke out on Sunday, Pollard had 14 rushes for 131 yards and 3 TDs. Zeke can't do this:
Tony Pollard 54-yard touchdown!
— RJ Ochoa (@rjochoa) October 30, 2022
(via @dallascowboys) pic.twitter.com/lg69tutJlv
The Cowboys can pretty easily get out of Zeke's contract next offseason. They should do that.
Last week: 3
2) Vikings (6-1): The Vikings have a 3.5-game lead in the NFC North, which is the biggest lead among all the division leaders:
• Vikings: 3.5 games
• Titans: 2 games
• Eagles and Bills: 1.5 games
• Chiefs, Falcons, and Seahawks: 1 game
• Falcons: 1 game
• Ravens: 0.5 games
Oddly, there are currently no divisions in which there's a tie for first place.
Last week: 2
1) Eagles (7-0): There's a weird argument going around that the Eagles haven't beaten anyone this season.
Trivia: There's only one team in the NFL that has beaten two six-win teams. Who is that team?
Last week: 1
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